Embracing Deep Gratitude

Creating Worlds Through What We Love

I'm still reflecting on Thanksgiving here in the United States. A problematic holiday in its whitewashing of history, it nonetheless reminds me that I do have things in my life for which I am grateful. 

Being thankful can feel like a real stretch for me right now. I am appalled at much of what is happening in my country, especially for those already at risk from systemic oppression. My heart breaks for what we are doing to our Mother Earth and our animal kin. I ache for those here and abroad who go to bed hungry. I lament the illness in the people I love that I cannot heal.

And yet, when I am fortunate enough to hear the hooting of the local Great Horned Owls or even luckier to see them perched high in the trees, my heart fills with delight. I treasure the feather they gifted me that sits on my altar, reminding me that they and I are part of the same web. 

The sliver of moon in the sky the last two nights, a sight I dubbed as a child the "God's Smile Moon," reminds me that I am part of a larger mystery which gives me peace.

My Christmas cacti are sprouting their blooms - the first one just began to open today. I just can't help but smile at each one.

And yesterday I had the opportunity to celebrate a mentor, Fran Powers, on the 25th anniversary of her birthing and nurturing Powerstories Theatre of Tampa, an organization that has blessed my life again and again. 

I'm truly in awe of all Fran has accomplished. Powers may be her married name but a more fitting one, I can't imagine. She birthed Powerstories from a dream that flashed into her head while riding a bike across the country. Her work has brought together so many amazing women, women I am deeply grateful to know.

Which brings me into deep, deep gratitude for the role of art in my life. 

It started with music. Being sung to and then singing along with songs my mother sang to me. Then all the years of my youth where I sang with choirs.

It expanded to dance when a new church member started an interpretive dance troupe and ignited my love of expression through movement.

And then, at the age of 15, I performed in my first theatrical production - and a life long love affair began.

Theater is my beloved. I am for it and it is for me. Nothing feeds me quite like the energy of a dark room and a lit stage. 

Some of my favorite moments are the rehearsals where the lights are being set (they have to be adjusted in color, angle, intensity for any given performance) - just standing there in the silence knowing that magic will soon be born right on that very spot.

I have had the privilege of performing some "bucket list roles" - Anita in West Side Story, Puck in a Midsummer Night's Dream, Lysistrata in Lysistrata. I've inhabited many more characters where I fell in love with the role while performing.

Each character I've portrayed has taught me something, offered me a gift, provided insight about my own life or the world around me. Each character has helped me step more deeply into me.

After years of performing, I also began to direct. My job became holding a whole play and not just a single character. It's a different approach to art - working with a whole vision and then diving into the intricacies.

I've loved them both, acting and directing. I've done some stage managing and producing along the way as well. They've also offered cherished opportunities to bring my beloved theater to life.

But the thing for which I am most grateful where theater is concerned is the people it's brought into my life. 

It's brought me almost all of my dearest friends and so many cherished moments of laughter, poignancy, tenderness. We've shared both blooper and highlight reel moments. 

It's brought me powerful mentors, like Fran, and their wisdom which enlarged my understanding of all that theater can be, including a way to change the world.

It's brought me the opportunity to collaborate with people - fellow actors, directors, costume designers, technicians - whose talents blow my mind. Collaborating around something meaningful and magical fills my soul.

There's something truly special about relationships that are formed in the birthing of a world.

For that's what every piece of live theater is, the birthing of a new world - a world full of messages and magic, sometimes laughter, sometimes tears - but a world we can inhabit to discover more about our fellow humans and ourselves. Whether we're on the stage or in the audience, we get to step into a moment in time that will never exist exactly the same way again.

And that fleeting nature is also part of what makes each moment so special. 

Art is at its best when the artist is being - not doing. I often say that the irony of acting is that "acting" is not very enjoyable to watch. An actor who puts on a character like an ill-fitting suit is not giving the audience what they really crave... which is authentic expression.

The best actors truly become their characters. The best musicians become one with their instruments. The best painters or sculptors let the medium move and shape through them.

And in doing so, they create new worlds.

And it is love that is the igniting spark. Love breathes the breath into art. Love breathes the breath into any cherished creation. Love is what animates.

What is it that you love? What do you long to animate into being? How can you flow that energy into something this week? How can you take the next step in creating your world?